Wednesday, July 31, 2013

The rest of my life.

Yesterday, we took one of our granddaughters on a grand day out. It pretty much went to plan, although I thought--fancifully, as it turned out--that we might take her to Les Madeleines for a pretty, magical lunch-stroke-snack. In actual life, we went to McDonald's, of course.
the granddaughter, at the beginning of the day out.

Granddaughter: I want Chicken McNuggets, fries, and a milkshake.

Me: Chocolate, vanilla, or strawberry?

Granddaughter: hmmm...chocolate.

The historian: I'll have a medium Coke and--do you have those yogurt parfaits?

Crackly speaker: crackle crackle Yes.

Me: Medium Coke and large fries.

Crackly speaker: (do I sense a faint derision?) crackle crackle dollars at the crackle window.

Later, as we drove home, and I experienced a certain mild nausea stemming from my lunch:

Me: I think I've had just about enough of lunches made of Coke and french fries.

The historian: Yeah?

Me:  In fact, maybe I've had enough of McDonald's to last me for the rest of my life.

This reminded both of us of an interview once conducted with Ruth, of Ruth's Diner, wherein she was asked, at age 80, if she ever thought she might remarry. She replied in the negative, saying, "I've had enough sex to last me the rest of my life."

Now, what else have I had enough of to last me the rest of my life? Besides McDonald's, I mean:

1. Possibly syndicated episodes of Two and a Half Men. I had a spate there for awhile (several years ago, now), but I cannot currently drum up even the faintest interest. Certainly not in the Ashton Kutcher version, but also not in the old Charlie Sheens. That show is dead to me.

2. Possibly kung pao shrimp. It was once the best thing in the entire universe. Now: meh.

3. Almost every food you can buy in a convenience store. Is this sad? A little. Each road trip, however, edges me a little closer to closure on this point.

4. Maybe Doritos. But maybe not. But probably, actually (see 3 above).

My friend Ann says probably she's had enough

5. Slim Jims

to last her the rest of her life (see 3 above also).

I might have had enough of

6. uncomfortable shoes. But maybe not. But probably. Mostly enough, anyway.

Some things I have not had enough of (excerpts from an inexhaustible list): cherries. Peaches. Tomatoes. Watermelon. Cheese in its multifarious glory. Naps. Lazy afternoons. Sufjan Stevens. White jeans in the summertime. Justified. Poetry, despite the fact that it is lousy with frustrations. Literally rife. Eating breakfast out--other meals, too--with friends and family. The birds chattering in the trees. Morning. Bruiser. Grandchildren. Nostalgia. Evening. Cake. Sleep.


  1. Taco Bell?
    But not french fries and Coke, just those things from McD's, right? Because french fries, done right...and Mexican coke...c'mon!!
    I never want to eat one of those convenience store "chocolate" donuts that are flour/sugar dipped in brown wax. Those suck.
    Also, bad/weak coffee. (is for suckers!)
    Also, bad chocolate of any kind.
    Also....action movies that are just action, action, shaky cam, action, no story. I don't need much, but just a little fishing line wire of a story. Seriously.
    Also those skinny women/fat man comedies. PLEASE.

  2. BTW, I agree about Two and a Half Men, though I admit to watching five minutes of it every now and again....I'm not sure how it's survived....

  3. Love your jumping off point with Ruth's had enough sex to last me a lifetime. Hilarious, though, personally not there yet. But I have had *definitely* enough of mcdonalds. Also: had enough big meaty breakfasts, naps of any kind, sleeping in past 6:30am, flying long distances in airplanes which I always had enough of, family reunions, beef and broccoli at chinese restaurants, The Red Robin and any restaurant of its ilk, big over-the-top action films with no story (w you Dr. W on this one), and many more but I've already revealed too much so I will stop.

  4. Just the best post ever. I am thinking, thinking, thinking of more things now.

  5. I agree with Ann. Well said -- I mean listed -- HT!

  6. I just read this again, I like it so much.

  7. Enough naps? Enough sleeping in past 6:30?

    Am I just greedy if I think I haven't had enough of anything yet to last me the rest of my life?



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