Monday, December 14, 2009

Vive la difference.


As I was washing my face before bed, I noticed that there was lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of cold water. Which was not getting warm. And thus, a house-capade which led us to the inescapable conclusion that our hot water heater was not working. A pilot light had gone out, which we--and by "we," I obviously mean "the historian"--could not get lit. Thus, a call to a plumber, but not until morning, because on the water heater, it says, and I quote, "If you cannot light the pilot light, call your pilot light lighting professional. But not until morning."

And thus, a slow fume on my part about turning and turning in the widening gyre, the falcon cannot hear the falconer, things fall apart, the centre cannot hold, mere anarchy is loosed upon the world &c &c. Not to mention the toilet in the hall bathroom needs a whole new mechanism thingie. Not to mention we need weatherstripping everywhere and probably new windows. Not to mention the mice.

And thus, a conversation in the dark, 12:30-ish a.m.

Me: So, you're saying that you don't think the house is just f***ing with us. You're saying, stuff sometimes breaks, so then you just fix it. And that's just how it is.

The historian: Yes. The latter.

TAGS: chaos theory, second law of thermodynamics


  1. Oh, "house-capade." Perfect! Somehow this term makes domestic disasters seem bearable--well, that and a copy of Yeats placed next to the wrenches, duct tape, and blow torch.

  2. I should write a comic novel called Humanities Housing, about a couple, schooled in the liberal arts, who know nothing about the functioning of day to day existence. This is, of course, based on my life. It might involve figuring out how to get more water in the washing machine (there's a knob for that!)and other such basics as those thingies in the toilet and the fact that houses need roofs. (really, roofs? In my day it would have been rooves. But what do I know squiggly red line?)

  3. I still suspect the animosity of inanimate objects and the gyre and all that.

  4. oi. Good thing you have the historian and his calm nature to keep things cool.

  5. Totally just had that conversation about our furnace in which I (much to my surprise) played the role of the Historian.

  6. I'm prone to the anarchy and the center falling apart ways of things. It's good to have an historian-like person to stop the gyrating brain.

  7. You all should just move. The housing market has collapsed. It is positively unbelievable what you can find on the market for very cheap these days.

    Of course you would have to sell your current abode. That's not so easy I guess. Hmm. Stay put, then.



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