- I appreciate the opportunity to speak to you on the subject of [ ].
- Here is my premise: [ ].
- Here is my evidence: [ ].
- Would you like to see my bona fides? I have lots. Lots and lots of bona fides.
- Here is my evidence, now represented in some mathematical form, as "data": [ ].
- I think you'll agree that all thinking persons must, in the face of reason, logic, and the irrefutable evidence and mathematical data I have placed before you, agree that [ ].
- How very interesting, to hear you offer your opinion. I shall listen, and then I shall retort.
- While I am willing to grant [ ], you must concede that [ ].
- Your assertion--that [ ]--is patent nonsense.
- Not at all. Not even. As if.
- You, if I may be so bold, are Absurd, and also kind of a butthead.
- Perhaps you have forgotten my many, many bona fides?
- I believe it was I--myself, moi--who called this meeting. Therefore, pipe down, you.
- Very well, have your say.
- There is a word, sir, for what you are. That word is "demagogue." Look it up.
Tuesday, September 01, 2009
For an all-purpose talk: